Responding to Susi’s challenge …
IWH Haiku Challenge #4 (Picture interpretation)
#1
The scream lies below
Trapped and halted in flight
Withering inside
#2
Modesty unleashed
Seeking tendrils of love
Dark desires atoned
#3
Find me in the night
Shimmering with cold desire
Reaching, touching time
**********************
Thanks to Jim for pointing me to this challenge.
Addendum: As I mentioned in a comment below, I looked again at the picture and saw an entirely different image! Not sure why I didn’t see “the baby” before …?? Obviously this means my haiku creations will seem a bit “strange.” All I can say at this point is pretend the picture isn’t there and just use your imagination.
Touching imagery in your words.
A lovely chain of haiku.
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Thank you so much, Hélène! And a Special Thank You for stopping by. 🙂
BTW, I have another blog that is more “creative-oriented” that you might want to visit. I only rarely post there, but perhaps you will enjoy reading the existing content. https:/chasingthemuses.wordpress.com
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Thank you for the invitation Nan, I will visit you.
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So boringly pedantic as always, I thought I’d ask, what is the purpose of the haiku form? Why do it – in other words, what’s the ‘artistry involved’ – and what is the reason this is such a national treasure of prosody for the Japanese?
Without investigating and trying to implement this understanding in a true haiku, the form of 5-7-5 doesn’t mean anything other than using an arbitrary constraint to express whatever. It’s like painting whatever but ‘constrained’ by using only 2 shades of the same colour; it’s not almost never art in either case but almost always craft. Crafting a haiku, then, is a facsimile of a haiku. For many Westerners especially, this is sufficient to accept the image as the original and call such craft ‘poetry’. But it’s not the same product as creating a real haiku any more than a sand drawing of the Eiffel Tower is an equivalent architectural marvel.
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Boy, what a spoil-sport your are! Did you get up on the wrong side of bed this morning?
To each his own, tildeb. I’m not “into” the heavy-duty technical stuff that you write about, but I certainly wouldn’t downgrade it as being “boringly pedantic.”
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No, no, no, Nan… the boring pedantic is ME. Not you. At all. That’s why I bothered to comment this way so that you could take or leave my questions without any receiving or causing any offense.
I can’t help but immediately compare and contrast such offerings with my knowledge about prosody generally and the haiku form specifically. That’s why rather than tell you unsolicited stuff that that I think would improve your work greatly, I asked the questions that I think would allow you to harness the obvious craft you have with the artistic challenge to produce what could be stunning an stunningly beautiful haiku poetry. But if people settle for the facsimile, for the form alone, they are missing the artistry entirely. And that’s what makes the haiku so remarkable.
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Oh.
O.K.
I think.
Seriously, I did re-read your comment and now see my “mis-interpretation.” Appreciate the “correction.”
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Well restraint can discipline our writing. Not everything is bettered by gazillion words. It’s a fun exercise, but not for everyone obviously.
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Not everything is bettered by gazillion words. YES!!!
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Interestingly it takes mere pedantic paragraphs to criticize 17 syllables.
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what is the purpose of the haiku form?
What’s the purpose of
A boringly pedantic
Critic of Haiku?
🙂
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Clever. 👏
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Ha! Many books have been written about just this, but at its core the haiku is a timeless and harmonious moment captured. This means there has to be two unrelated ideas (the natural moment and the poet’s moment) that, together – with short, blunt words if one is to respect the Japanese tradition – form a cohesive capturing whole that attempts to resonate with everyone. Haikus are for the reader to gain insight into themselves.
It is, I think, the most artistically challenging form of poetry and requires (again, I think) real and not manufactured artistry to find that beautiful and simple yet profoundly moving linking element. If I don’t encounter two ideas in a haiku form then I know I’m not reading a real haiku; I’m reading word-smithy craft (prose) in the 5-7-5 facsimile and not poetic art (prosody).
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So … in your esteemed opinion, how would you “grade” the haikus I presented in this post?
BTW, I have written and posted three of my (much earlier) haikus on my creative blog (link in blog heading). They were written during a Creative Writing class in college so perhaps they are more “traditional.”
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Fall is your best.
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Thanks. I like that one too. I suppose I really should try and do more creative writing.
I actually liked the haikus I wrote on this post (even though they didn’t really match the picture after I looked at it more closely). And perhaps in the “truest sense,” they’re lacking. But I was satisfied with them.
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Ah, the morning sun
winters elusive sky gem
refreshing to see
Todays weather report 🙂
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Aha! Your inner talents are exposing themselves! Good job, shelldigger!
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Tis a shame my true talents lie in making the wise man wince and the pompous man sneer contemptuously.
😉
I thought yours were pretty good. More depth than I can muster today 🙂
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Nice work Nan!! It’s nice to see you’re not just a cold heathen…
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😈
😍
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Nice. I really like it.
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❤❤❤
Thank you!!
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Something interesting just happened. I looked again at the picture and saw an entirely different image! Hmmm. Very strange.
Perhaps I should “haiku” again (even though I’ve already submitted my “limit” to the challenge). Nawwww. Enough confusion for one blog.
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It’s just Jesus effing with you.
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I always suspected he had a mischievous side!
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Hi Nan! Thanks for participating in the challenge. Great job. 🙂 And thanks for the follow on I Write Her. I appreciate it. I hope you enjoy my thoughts.
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I rarely write “creatively” anymore so this was fun. I’m going to try and do it more often — maybe your challenges will help. 🥰
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I hope you do! Glad you enjoyed it. 🙂
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